As with most issues in life, I do not totally agree with any one person or philosophy, but I do find it useful to gather information and insights from a variety of sources. I began looking into people with extreme selfish behaviors, actions I could not understand, after noticing the behavior of a royal family member during Queen Elizabeth’s funeral. Various commentators on youtube, elucidating on the label Narcissist, connected the characteristics with this individual’s demonstrable behavior, back tracking over many years, actions continuing into the present time.

With my professional background in family therapy, I dove more deeply into two commentators presenting clinical and professional observations related to those living with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). As they give practical and real life examples, I find their insights very useful to my understanding, furthering the way forward with Mother, as well as with others who have come across my path professionally and personally.

Lady Colin Campbell, whose mother’s behaviors were clinically diagnosed, including narcissism, writes in great detail in her book, describing actions and professional interpretations. I highly recommend, Daughter of Narcissist (2009), for those struggling to understand such behaviors. I have shared previously while covering Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) link. There is much overlap with my Mother’s behavior, infecting those around her.  

Armed with vivid insights into my Mother’s behaviors, knowing others have lived through what I have, with professional NPD diagnoses and clinical recommendations previous shared, I still was not fully equipped as to how to move forward. This I found in the works of HG Tudor.

Firstly, Mr Tudor, explaining his insights regarding dropping BPD diagnosis in lieu of NPD, piqued my interest. I find the commonality quite interesting. I will leave it to the professionals to duke it out.

I have listened to many of Mr. Tudor’s videos and have read several of his books. From these I have gained much useful knowledge and practical tips, helping me to understand the characteristics of those lying on the continuum from Empath, through Normal, to Narcissism, with all the in-between variants. More importantly, copious amounts of insight into the Narc’s thought processes, attitudes and treatment toward others, along with how to deal with and extricate one’s self from these relationships, have helped me move forward with living.

From his bio, a self-described narcissist psychopath, HG Tudor “is the world-renown authority on narcissism, and the prolific author of more than 40 books and programs.” He shares from his own perspective gained from therapy and observations, “the true mindset, behaviors and aims of the narcissist.” You will find a wealth of information at his website.

To further stimulate my quest for answers and understanding of Mother’s behaviors, HG informs us, “false hopes will be extinguished and replaced with pure logic defenses.” We are promised details on how to deal with and escape from narcissistic abuse.